Defining and Adapting Your Leadership Style | IdeaCast | Podcast

Highlights

They just don't quite have the gravitas, they're not engaging enough, they're not charismatic enough, they're not dynamic. (View Highlight)

Style and personality are not the same.Personality is much more who you are-- largely unchangeable--and style, on the other hand, is not personality.It's a set of behaviors, it's a set of habits,it's what you do.So the quickest thing we come to when we talk to a manager or somebody that we're coaching--and we say, people really find you arrogant.Well, frankly, we don't care so muchwhether the person is or isn't arrogant by personality. (View Highlight)

They either are giving off what we call the power behaviors
or they're giving off what we call the attractive behaviors. (View Highlight)

The idea is the power behaviors in the positive is when you get these attributionsof dynamic, charismatic, confident, commanding,an expert, articulate, easy to listen to, influential. (View Highlight)

are these attractive markers as well, which those attributions are passive, quiet, deferential, nice, easy to talk to, great mentor, great teammate, collaborator. All good stuff.But on the downside, sometimes, itwas all the things around weak, too passive, too deferential, not really a leader, doesn't have gravitas, doesn't get listened to, too detail-oriented, too many (View Highlight)

Note:: 100% me

Yeah, and it's a classic over-rotation.Style with very minor tweaks can make big differences. (View Highlight)

And I go to him and I say, here's
two or three things you can do.Well, he, instead of doing two or three things, does five or six of them. (View Highlight)

Really, one or two would have been fine.It's just a slight flex. (View Highlight)

We need people to all be very authentic to who they are, but we all have range.And as soon as we find somebody's range and say, we think your range from going powerful to attractive is about here, stay within your range, and it's all very authentic. (View Highlight)

I want you to think more specifically in every situation you go into, how do you want to be seen? (View Highlight)

Focus more on the behavior.Sometimes, frankly, we're going to go into situations and say I do not feel confident.But the question is, I really don't want people to know that, so what can I do that shows confidence, that has me behave more confidently?And the idea is those emotions catch up with the behavior.When I give a presentation, for example, there's no way 100% of the time you're going to feel confident.But if I walk out there looking down, my shoulders down, I can't look at the audience-- (View Highlight)

is going through something tough--how do I want to be perceived today?I want to be perceived as a great listener.And the next day, I need to be perceived as the authority that's going to say that behavior is not OK.So it changes if you flex it.If not, we get attributions as parents too-- you're this.And people that flex more don't get those same attributions.They're more strategic with their style. (View Highlight)